Poem: April Beckons...

April is knocking on the door
and it's still the month,
I had been

 waiting for.
Because it's the fourth month 
in the year,
That brings me so much closer
To both my dreams and my fears.

Finally, I will be stepping out
Leave all of those doubts,
At the door.
Because I know now, you
Shouldn't define my life anymore.
You're nothing but a distant memory.
You shouldn't have the stranglehold on me.

Every time your face pops into my mind,
You know what thought comes in?
"That guy probably got laid,
time and time, over by now."
It sends a shudder down my spine.
But then I smile,
Remembering what's to come: April Sunshine.

I wonder who's the real victim here,
You, me, that girl or this new guy...
Because you know, time does fly.
And if you don't do something right now,
It will slip through your fingers forever.
Though you think you're so damn clever,
I remember when you said we would always have time.
I bet you never thought about the April Sunshine.

It's time for new beginnings
And let go of the bitter endings...
If this story has to end, and if you've moved on.
I'd rather you just tell me. Get it over with.
Because every time I talk to you, 
There comes a horrible ember of hope.
Which refuses to go away.
And I can't lead my life this way.
Not anymore.

"I used to say that we were forever, ever, ever...
And I used to say never say never"

Because I cannot lead someone on,
And let them down. Because I am still waiting,
Hoping against hope, and wondering...
I cannot ask someone else to do what
I have been putting myself through.
You really need to stop lurking around behind
Your damned mask and tell me,
"I moved on and so should you."

And believe me, it won't take me
even a second to forget you.
All the so-called good memories,
All the times we'd both just lied,
With a snap of the fingers, I will forget
All the times, the shared secrets and dreams
The fact I was yours and you were mine.

Because the perfect time to move on beckons,
April beckons....
And right around this corner,
there's April Sunshine.


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